The face that people with dementia feel they need to present to the world can mask all manner of things. This is one of Stephen’s longer videos as part of his long-running series on living with vascular dementia. It’s well worth a listen and will resonate with many people, including those without dementia.

Hi everybody. Welcome to my two hundred and fourteenth video, “Living with Vascular Dementia”.

Yeah. I just want to talk today a little bit about loneliness and – loneliness and dementia. It can impact – I think it can impact anybody with dementia.  And I think loneliness is a, you know, it’s something that you don’t wish for for anybody really, but, you know. But it can affect you mentally. It’s certainly affecting me. Yeah, it seems to be, you know, coming out in me then, I guess?

I try not to think about it too much but you can’t help it, because it’s always there.  That’s why I wanted to talk about that today in this video. I’m experiencing it; I’m experiencing it and it’s hard, it really is hard. You can’t – you know, you can’t – it’s hard to explain. You feel like your mood is not as it should be.  I mean, with dementia and all other problems as well, other disabilities, it’s hard enough isn’t it, but when you get a lot of loneliness as well it doesn’t help the situation whatsoever. That’s why I wanted to get it out there.

It doesn’t do you any good, put it that way. Yeah, it’s – and I guess there’s a lot of people with dementia do feel that way about it. Loneliness can be, can be bad. You know, it can upset you whole daily mood, and your mood gets low and lower and it’s a hard job to crawl back up again.  You can put on a front, you can put on a front with it, but it’s never right, then. Put it that way.

I mean, I do quite often, I do put up a front. Sometimes you have to. Sometimes you have to, and you know, it just goes on from there really, but it’s a tricky subject isn’t it. And I guess there’s a lot of people out there with dementia who do suffer a lot from it. You know, there must be a lot of people out there that get the same feelings I do. You don’t really know how to explain it really, but I am hopefully in a week or two getting some help from a mental health team.  Hopefully.  Might be able to sort me out a little bit.

It’s just, it’s a strange, strange, I mean – I don’t know, I’ve never exp- I mean, I’ve been on my own before, at times, and you know, it just feels like that at the moment. Can’t really – can’t really explain it, but it’s there. You know. It never goes away. But, you know, you can – people can say like, you know –

I guess it goes along with dementia I think.  It goes along with the brain sort of, you know, it’s such a complex engine, your brain, that you don’t know how to react with it I guess, well I don’t anyway. But, you know, I do put on a front, and people see it I think.

Very very strange. It just feels strange at the minute because of it, and I guess it shouldn’t be like it really, but certain things do make you feel like that, and you know, you have to talk about these things because if you don’t, it can drive you up the wall. And I’m just trying to tell everybody, explain to everybody how loneliness can affect you, you know? And affect your everyday living, and life, and whatever you do, you know?

But anyway, I’ll leave it there for now, and try not to get too depressed about it. But you know, it’s there. But anyway, I’ll catch everyone on the next one, and take care to everybody and I’ll catch you all again next time.