Agnes is finding solace from a devastatingly vivid dream.

Hello everybody,

I hope this Diary, when you hear it, that you’re safe and well, and that is a blessing during this pandemic.

What I wanted to say to you is that – and I am saying “hello” and I’m not saying “good morning” because for me, “hello” captures what – my greeting, because there was nothing good about how I woke up this morning. I’m still emotionally shook up about it.

I had one of those vivid dreams. People with dementia will know what I’m talking about. (Inaudible) you believe they’re real. They are real to you. Emotionally, they’re real and this particular one was bad. It was horrendous and it’s left me very emotional. I’m making this Diary with tears streaming down my face because I didn’t think… “How am I going to bounce back and start my day with this feeling?”.. in my heart, in my head, this fear. My chest is heavy, the pain in it with this dread and fear from the dream.

Anyway, what I’d done was, I remembered that I had watched Mass. Father Sweeney had said Mass yesterday and I – on my iPad I got the Mass up, and that took me to a place of healing. And then, at the end, he’d done the Stations of the Cross and that was easing, so the cares and the fears became more healing tears. Oh, I still had tears streaming down my face and I’ve still got the pain in my chest and I’m shook up, but it’s more a healing -“Yes – I’ll get over this today – yes!” I know, because of using this technology, this wonderful technology that’s out there – I used it and it’s helping me to get over what – oh! – was devastating.

I just wanted to share that. I wanted to thank Father Sweeney and Sister xxx(?), her taking time out to do these services. And I don’t know if they realise just the sorrows of the people who they are touching.
But I felt the need to share this and to let us know that it’s resilience, we’re finding ways to overcome the challenges that are facing us, either through dementia or through this pandemic or through the social isolation. Somehow, with the help of our friends, our virtual friends, and using IT, we can get over this. And I count my blessings and I thank that I have learnt, over the years, how to use the little that I can to be able to have it as a tool. It’s one of the things in my tool box that I can pick up to help to get over some situations that dementia sends me.

Bye – and count your blessings and seize and be mindful today. Smell the roses, open the window if you can’t get out and feel that breeze on your face. And think of the ones in hospital, struggling for every breath, and how they would just love to be able to breathe in that lovely smell.

Thanks very much,

Bye, have a lovely day!